Officially 1111 days.

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Few Days ago was my lolita anniversary. Such a silly term, but i've never actually realize about it until the other day i was browsing some folders and i found pics of the very first meet up i went to.
To be fairly honest, i've not been frilling for a long time, but i do feel i've grown so much in these past years.

2008


*begginer handmade /offbrand stage, not so great, did my first skirt with the help of my grandma*


2009


*better handmade stage, did stuff myself lol*

2010

*first online purchase stage (though that was not my first purchase but you get the point)*

2011

*brand stage, got my dream dress with all my savings*
what's next, who knows?

Looking at all those pictures from past meetups made me think about the actual meaning of Lolita.
I do beleive in a lifestyle. not the cute, pink, cake and tea part, but to appreciate the beauty of life, the details. To me, fashion is art. Something that represents you and your culture, your likes and dislikes, your interests and passions. But lolita is not just pretty dresses. Of course i do fancy tea very much, adore history, love literature and i enjoy sewing, but those things are all part of what i am.
Lolita gives me the freedom to express all that, it gives me joy and happiness. i don't care about the stares and the gossiping. This is what i am, and i'm rebellious enough to dress up and show it to the whole world without caring about what someone will say or do.It fills me in a way that few things to, i feel happy walking around like a giant cupcake. Sharing things with girls all around the world, pictures, histories, giggles, maybe you don't know the girl in the photo, but you respect and admire her, you've no idea what her voice sounds like, and you wish to meet her someday.
Lolita let me do all that,travel and met amazing girls whom i once chatted with and never ever listen their voices, girls that i admire for years until one day we met in a magical tea party in another country, far away from home. I became more creative and crafty, more confident (if that's possible). I've heard people tell me it's just a stage, but you know, how can you leave something that identifies you?
i've walked a long path, along with some of the people i now can call friends. I've had amazing experiences and was lucky enough to meet the most inspiring and talented people in the scene. I know i am a lolita cause i don't need to wear a dress to be one, a doctor is always a doctor, even when he is not in the hospital, and that is just the way i see it. I can't stop being who i am, speaking how i speak or doing what i do. even with jeans and a tshirt, i'm still me.
I've seen girls join the party . i've cried with "leaving lolita sales" and i've had my heart stopped when winning an auction. The feeling of opening a box and touching that garment that you craved for, trying it on, looking into the mirror and seeing yourself with it, as you imagined, has no price or possible human description. There are way to many things to learn, this is not easy. With lolita i discovered a part of me that i had since forever faceless, until i put a name to it. I know it may seem silly, but it is also very very hard to describe, because is a complex and subjective feeling that you may not understand so easily.
i still have loads of things on my to-do list, but i feel i'm on the right track, cause after all 1111 days is not that much, is it?

2 comments:

  1. A lot of what you said here resonates with me. Lolita is who I am, just like goth--like Momoko, I'll die at 80 in a loli dress (or something like that). XD But seriously... Anyway, congrats on your lolita anniversary! My first one was last month. :3

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  2. Congrats on your anniversary! I know how much fun it is to look back and see how you've progressed as a Lolita.

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